"Take care of the people you love. But, also take even better care of the people that love you." - Unknown
Last night I was made welcome in the lives of people who have known and loved each other for years. Last night I laughed so hard I thought my sides would split, I felt happy and warm, and it wasn't just the rum. Last night I went to sleep in the arms of someone who loves me and I woke up in those very arms feeling happy and like this year, 2017, will be something special. When I look back at 2016 I will remember that it was the year I took back control of my life, and the year that I discovered the true strength of friendship and love. I will also remember that it was the year I met the loveliest and kindest man I've ever known.
Bob Marley said, "Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you've never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can't wait to tell them about it knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embararassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you're not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn't exist at all. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is special to you. You open your heart knowing there's a chance it may be broken one day, and in opening your heart you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible."
When I read that, I of course was drawn to how it makes me feel about AD, but as I re-read it I realise Bob might have it a bit wrong, because whilst I have a met a man who makes me feel all of those things, I also see my friends and family in all of those words and it makes me feel like I might just be the luckiest person alive.
On new years day in 2016 I wrote a list of 12 challenges that I wanted to personally achieve throughout the year, and even though I didn't achieve everything I am proud that I made so many things come true with hard work, some sweat and a lot of determination. I remember standing in the snow last January asking my ex if his reluctance to participate in life with me meant I would never get to see the world with the person I loved. I remember my heart breaking when he said I wouldn't. But I now realise that I did see the world with people I loved, I wasn't alone on my journey, I walked for more than 500km, sure some of it I was alone, but for lots of it I was with friends and family. I climbed a mountain and ran a race with some of my best friends by my side urging and cheering me on. My ex was wrong. I just didn't know it at the time. I realised this as I stood at the top of the Cow and Calf rocks looking out over Yorkshire and AD wrapped his arms around me, kissed my cheek and told me he loved me.
So a look back at my 2016 challenges:-
1) Run a 5km race - I signed up to run the Race for Life Pretty Muddy 5km on the 3rd September. It was hard, it was not pretty, but thanks to Stacey, I did it!
2) Walk or run a total of 500km - I did this in bite size chunks, but once I found my legs, I'd completed this by June! Thanks to Ross who helped me celebrate with champagne and party poppers!
3) Lose 20kg/3 Stone - I managed to lose 2 stone, however as we end the year I've put over half of what I lost back on, the search for skinny Lini is always ongoing!
4) Climb a mountain or a peak - Despite trying and failing to get to Snowdon all year long, Lyndsey and I scaled Pen-y-Ghent, well I huffed and puffed but I made it!!
5) Write a childrens book - Unfortunately I didn't get to doing this one, however, I have written this blog instead! I'd say that's an achievement in itself!
6) Save £500 or more - Saved and spent now!!!
7) Go 50 days without buying any clothes, shoes or handbags - I managed 86 days! I was rather proud of this one!
8) Explore the UK - I only managed England, but I saw some sights and lots of beaches!!
9) Look up a new word every day for a month - From hebetude to salubrious I ended 2016 in an insouciant manner.
10) Carry out 5 or more random acts of kindness - I have managed more than 5 of these because there is gift in giving without expectations.
11) Start or gain a qualification - Unfortunately I didn't get round to this, but I am due to start one in April 2017!
12) Take the stairs - This one was a bit hit and miss... But I do think more conciously about taking the stairs instead of the lift! And I've done the 199 steps at Whitby twice this year!
For 2017 I have another 12 challenges, but 6 of them are going to be joint challenges, joint experiences and I cannot wait!!!
So now I've had a look back, I'm even prouder of myself, because 2016 did not start easily, and it was a rollercoaster of emotions, but through it all, my wonderful family, my amazing friends and my gorgeous boyfriend have loved me, supported me and revealed strength I never knew I had.
I wish everyone who is still with me on this blog journey a very happy and healthy new year, I hope 2017 brings you everything you need, I hope your burdens are light and your successes are many. You are all stronger than you know, trust me.
Much love
Lini xxxx
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